terrshee's Diaryland Diary

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I'm an Id(iot)

I seen to have become the class Id(iot). Usually I'm the SuperEgo type who calls on everyone to behave like adults. But since I'm spending so much time with my Shadow side, it appears my less controlled nature is coming to the fore.

It is now my unofficial role to personify the fears, frustrations and general angst. My pseudo-leadership is in verbalizing my struggles while others around me nod and laugh in empathy. At break, I am approached with confessions of feeling inadequate and worried about getting through, and how comforting it is that someone else is experiencing the same trials. I am the focus of the do-gooders who wish to help and find an outlet for their superior knowledge and skills.

None of this is proving to be much fun, but it does have a certain ironic quality that provides some compensation.

From the Merriam-Webster OnLine Dictionary:

Main Entry: id�i�ot
Pronunciation: 'i-dE-&t
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French ydiote, from Latin idiota ignorant person, from Greek idiOtEs one in a private station, layman, ignorant person, from idios one's own, private; akin to Latin suus one's own -- more at SUICIDE
1 usually offensive : a person affected with idiocy
2 : a foolish or stupid person
- idiot adjective

I am reading a history of the mutiny on the Bounty. I was browsing the remainder stacks and came across what looked to be a decent book.

I'm really not much for 18th century history, nor particularly interestsed in naval themes (although if anyone knows a decent book or two on sea travel to China in the 19th century, do let me know). But it occured to me this is one of those iconic events in history to which one can refer, but about which one really knows little.

So far it is surprisingly interesting, mostly as a study in how people reveal themselves when confronted with claustraphobic situations and the vast unknown.

How many people every really know themselves or the ones closest to them? Why is betrayal so often a surprise? Why do people pick their own self interest even when it means almost certain destruction?

7:35 a.m. - 2005-11-29
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